In Part 1, on my last blog, I said, because we are collectivist people living in individualist societies, therapy is woefully inadequate and, it’s what we have right now.
Another way in which therapy is woefully inadequate, is in the rigid way we tend to ‘do’ therapy.
I’ve been following the work of philosopher and psychologist Bayo Akomolafe for a few years, and while his use of language at times requires me to access deeply poetic and academic parts of my brain, it’s worth the stretch.
He is leading a conversation right now about what constitutes care and offers the possibility of a “tracing of wonder” within the therapy experience.
This he says, invites a “more embodied, sensorial engagement with experience, aligning with an emphasis on ‘sprawl’ rather than ‘depth’. It suggests that transformation might occur through subtle shifts in our patterns of relation rather than dramatic insights or catharses. It opens up possibilities for engaging with shadow elements as sites of creative potential rather than problems to be resolved or integrated.”
His thoughts have also led me to reflect on how we are expected to always be ok, to be on, to fit within a certain behavioural mould. And how often this is the goal of therapy. When in fact, some of us may need work days that are shorter, time for recovery from being around people, adaptions made to educational systems, to be released from environments that are polluting the emotional air we breathe.
We are offered meds and CBT, a reframing of our thought patterns (I’m a fan of all of these), when often what we need is to be seen for who we are with our oddities, our different sleep habits, our neurodivergent directness or big feelings and our need for embodiment over the static, daily grind.
We need systems, workplaces, classrooms and families, to be more agile and compassionate. Compassion meaning, com ‘with’ passion ‘feeling.’ People and groups able to be with our feelings.
So while we work for these to change, therapy is what we have now.
It’s why I love somatics. Why I’ll always ask about your environment, your health and the ways in which you feel trapped. It’s why I invite you into accessing a felt sense of safety in your body, noticing, ‘tracing wonder’, slowing down, listening in. Asking that therapist question, where do you feel that in your body.
…and why I’ll invite you to have compassion for yourself. Being able to be with our feelings is a superpower.
If you’d like to make an appointment for counselling online or in-person in Marrickville, you can book in here.
Warmly,
JANE
